Today is Thanksgiving. I am very thankful for all the blessings in my life. So please don't get the wrong impression about what I am going to say.
This past week has been a very hard, and I know it is going to get harder. A couple of days ago I was cleaning part of my closet (that's right, I was cleaning). I came across a half completed counted cross stitch project I was making for someone very special. Someone who has since passed on. During the past five years I have found this project in the closet several times. I just kept moving it from shelf to shelf. I didn't even open the sack. I knew what was in it. For some reason I could not let it go. But this week when I picked up the sack I actually opened it. I took out the project and looked at all the work I had put into it. Could I actually finish it and give it to someone else? No. The project had an owner and she would never get to see the love in my stitches. It would never be completed and hang on a bedroom wall. I put it back in the sack along with all the pretty colored threads and the pattern. I tied up the sack and then walked across the street and threw it in the dumpster. It was gone and once again my heart broke.
How many times will your heart heal from being broken? In the book "The Second Time Around" by Mary Higgins Clark she writes : "It's funny how, even long after you've accepted the grief of losing someone you love and truly have gotten on with your life, every once in a while something comes up that plays "gotcha", and for a moment or two the scar tissue separates and the wound is raw again."
That was how I felt. That is how I am feeling. It will get better, it always does. It just takes time.
No matter how thankful you are for your blessings, you still miss the loss. That's just life.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Ohhhh Mom... This really tugged my heart. I didn't know you had been working on something for her. I know you are sad a times I am too. I am glad that we can still enjoy the good things in life because we do have many and I am sure more to come. Myself just like you miss the ones I have lost (especially at this time of year). The next few weeks will be sad but will also be grand. I hope we both can take the sad and find a glad to go with it. Remember the ones we have lost and love the ones we still have. I love you so much more than you can ever know.
ReplyDelete